Please take a look at Articles on self-defense/conflict/violence for introductions to the references found in the bibliography page.

Please take a look at my bibliography if you do not see a proper reference to a post.

Please take a look at my Notable Quotes

Hey, Attention on Deck!

Hey, NOTHING here is PERSONAL, get over it - Teach Me and I will Learn!


When you begin to feel like you are a tough guy, a warrior, a master of the martial arts or that you have lived a tough life, just take a moment and get some perspective with the following:


I've stopped knives that were coming to disembowel me

I've clawed for my gun while bullets ripped past me

I've dodged as someone tried to put an ax in my skull

I've fought screaming steel and left rubber on the road to avoid death

I've clawed broken glass out of my body after their opening attack failed

I've spit blood and body parts and broke strangle holds before gouging eyes

I've charged into fires, fought through blizzards and run from tornados

I've survived being hunted by gangs, killers and contract killers

The streets were my home, I hunted in the night and was hunted in turn


Please don't brag to me that you're a survivor because someone hit you. And don't tell me how 'tough' you are because of your training. As much as I've been through I know people who have survived much, much worse. - Marc MacYoung

WARNING, CAVEAT AND NOTE

The postings on this blog are my interpretation of readings, studies and experiences therefore errors and omissions are mine and mine alone. The content surrounding the extracts of books, see bibliography on this blog site, are also mine and mine alone therefore errors and omissions are also mine and mine alone and therefore why I highly recommended one read, study, research and fact find the material for clarity. My effort here is self-clarity toward a fuller understanding of the subject matter. See the bibliography for information on the books. Please make note that this article/post is my personal analysis of the subject and the information used was chosen or picked by me. It is not an analysis piece because it lacks complete and comprehensive research, it was not adequately and completely investigated and it is not balanced, i.e., it is my personal view without the views of others including subject experts, etc. Look at this as “Infotainment rather then expert research.” This is an opinion/editorial article/post meant to persuade the reader to think, decide and accept or reject my premise. It is an attempt to cause change or reinforce attitudes, beliefs and values as they apply to martial arts and/or self-defense. It is merely a commentary on the subject in the particular article presented.


Note: I will endevor to provide a bibliography and italicize any direct quotes from the materials I use for this blog. If there are mistakes, errors, and/or omissions, I take full responsibility for them as they are mine and mine alone. If you find any mistakes, errors, and/or omissions please comment and let me know along with the correct information and/or sources.



“What you are reading right now is a blog. It’s written and posted by me, because I want to. I get no financial remuneration for writing it. I don’t have to meet anyone’s criteria in order to post it. Not only I don’t have an employer or publisher, but I’m not even constrained by having to please an audience. If people won’t like it, they won’t read it, but I won’t lose anything by it. Provided I don’t break any laws (libel, incitement to violence, etc.), I can post whatever I want. This means that I can write openly and honestly, however controversial my opinions may be. It also means that I could write total bullshit; there is no quality control. I could be biased. I could be insane. I could be trolling. … not all sources are equivalent, and all sources have their pros and cons. These needs to be taken into account when evaluating information, and all information should be evaluated. - God’s Bastard, Sourcing Sources (this applies to this and other blogs by me as well; if you follow the idea's, advice or information you are on your own, don't come crying to me, it is all on you do do the work to make sure it works for you!)



“You should prepare yourself to dedicate at least five or six years to your training and practice to understand the philosophy and physiokinetics of martial arts and karate so that you can understand the true spirit of everything and dedicate your mind, body and spirit to the discipline of the art.” - cejames (note: you are on your own, make sure you get expert hands-on guidance in all things martial and self-defense)



“All I say is by way of discourse, and nothing by way of advice. I should not speak so boldly if it were my due to be believed.” - Montaigne


I am not a leading authority on any one discipline that I write about and teach, it is my hope and wish that with all the subjects I have studied it provides me an advantage point that I offer in as clear and cohesive writings as possible in introducing the matters in my materials. I hope to serve as one who inspires direction in the practitioner so they can go on to discover greater teachers and professionals that will build on this fundamental foundation. Find the authorities and synthesize a wholehearted and holistic concept, perception and belief that will not drive your practices but rather inspire them to evolve, grow and prosper. My efforts are born of those who are more experienced and knowledgable than I. I hope you find that path! See the bibliography I provide for an initial list of experts, professionals and masters of the subjects.

THE RELUCTANT WARRIOR (A Story)

A Story of Learning, Training, and the Off-Chance Encounter

 

Grounded in Okinawan Isshin-Ryū Karate-Jutsu

The goal of martial arts is not the perfection of a physical technique, but the perfection of character. — Gichin Funakoshi


Part One: The First Step

 

Chapter 1 — The Question Nobody Wants to Ask

 

Marcus Dillard had never been in a fight. Not a real one. He was forty-three years old, lived on the eastern edge of a Nevada valley where the mountains rose abruptly from the high desert, and had spent his entire adult life carefully arranging his affairs so that conflict of any serious kind never found him. He believed, without quite examining the belief, that violence was something that happened to other people — to the careless, the unlucky, or the actively looking for it.


Then one Tuesday evening, walking to his truck in the parking structure behind the post office on Esmeralda Avenue, he passed a man in a hooded jacket who said nothing and did nothing — except fix Marcus with a look that traveled through him like a current. Marcus walked faster. He reached his truck, pulled out, and drove home with his hands slightly trembling on the wheel.


He sat in his driveway for a long time.


Nothing had happened. And yet something had. He had felt, for the first time as an adult, that he was prey — that somewhere in the cellular memory that evolution had spent a million years writing into his nervous system, an alarm had sounded, and he had had nothing to do with that alarm except to feel afraid and hurry away.

He could not stop thinking about what would have happened if the man had taken a step toward him.

 

He found the dojo three days later, tucked behind a tire shop on a strip of commercial real estate that was mostly storage units and a tax preparer who seemed to be open year-round. A hand-painted wooden sign over the door read: ISSHIN-RYŪ KARATE-JUTSU. Below it, someone had taped a laminated card: Beginner classes Tuesday and Thursday, 6:30 PM.

He stood on the sidewalk and looked at it for a long time. He was a grown man. This was ridiculous. He was also still thinking about the parking garage.


He walked in.

 

Chapter 2 — Sensei

 

The instructor's name was Elena Ruiz. She was fifty-one years old, five-foot-four, and had been teaching Isshin-Ryū for over two decades. She wore no black belt during his first visit — just a plain gi and bare feet, and she moved around the training floor the way water moves around stone: without wasted effort and without urgency.

She asked him, before anything else, why he was there.

He told her about the parking garage.

She nodded. She seemed entirely unsurprised.


'Most people who walk through that door,' she said, 'have had a moment like yours. Something reminded them that the world has edges, and that they have been living as though it doesn't. That's actually a healthy moment to have, as long as you don't let it turn into paranoia. What you felt — that's your nervous system doing its job. What we're going to do here is teach the rest of you to catch up to it.'


She told him what the art was. Isshin-Ryū — 'the style of the whole heart' — was developed in Okinawa in the early twentieth century by Tatsuo Shimabuku, who synthesized elements of Shorin-Ryū and Gōjū-Ryū into a streamlined, practical system built for real self-defense rather than sport competition. The techniques were compact. The stances were natural. The philosophy, she said, was simple: you train not because you are looking for violence, but because you are serious about not being helpless if it finds you.


'This art is not about aggression,' she said. 'It is about capability. There is an enormous difference.'

 

Chapter 3 — White Belt: Learning to See

 

The first lesson had nothing to do with striking or blocking. It had to do with where he put his eyes.

Sensei Ruiz called it condition awareness. She drew it on a whiteboard in four colors: white, yellow, orange, red.


'White,' she said, 'is where most people spend most of their lives. Completely absorbed in their own heads. Phone in hand, earbuds in, thinking about what they're going to make for dinner. In Condition White, you are not a person in an environment — you are a person in a mental simulation of your own life, and the environment is just scenery.'

She capped the marker.

'That's fine at home. It is not fine in a parking garage at 7 PM.'

Condition Yellow, she explained, was simply being present. Awake. Scanning without anxiety. It was not hypervigilance — it was the calm, relaxed alertness that a healthy animal in the wild maintains most of the time. Ears up. Eyes moving. Aware of exits, of who else is present, of anything that has changed since you last looked.


'You can live in Condition Yellow all day without exhausting yourself,' she said. 'It doesn't require fear. It only requires attention.'


Marcus thought about the parking garage and realized, with some embarrassment, that he had been deep in Condition White the entire time he was walking to his truck. He had been composing an email in his head. He had not seen the hooded man until he was three feet away.


The first thing Isshin-Ryū taught him, before any technique, was how to pay attention.

 

The second thing it taught him was how to read people.


Sensei Ruiz introduced him to what she called pre-attack indicators — not with the drama of a thriller novel, but with the quiet authority of someone who had spent decades thinking carefully about violence. 


Would-be attackers, she explained, often telegraph. Not always, not reliably — but often. They look at your hands and your pockets before they look at your face. They adjust their clothing. They close distance without a social reason for doing so. They scan the environment for witnesses.


'The body knows things before the brain catches up,' she said. 'Gavin de Becker called it the gift of fear. He wasn't wrong. That feeling you had in the parking garage — that wasn't imagination. That was thousands of years of ancestral threat-detection firing on cue. Your job is not to dismiss that signal. Your job is to learn how to read it and respond to it wisely.'

 

Chapter 4 — The First Kata

 

Kata — prearranged sequences of movements against imaginary opponents — are the living library of Isshin-Ryū. His first was Seisan, one of the oldest kata in Okinawan karate, a form of compressed, violent logic: a series of blocks, strikes, and steps that encodes principles of distance management, targeting, and structure under pressure into the body's muscle memory.

He was terrible at it. He felt self-conscious and mechanical, like a man describing a language he did not speak by reciting its letters. His stances were wrong. His punches had no snap. He reached the end of the sequence and looked up to find Sensei Ruiz watching him with an expression that was neither encouraging nor discouraging.


'Again,' she said.

He did it again.

'Again.'


He understood, somewhere around the fifth repetition, what she was doing. She was not teaching him a sequence of movements. She was teaching his body something, bypassing the part of his brain that analyzed and worried and compared itself to an imagined standard. The kata was a conversation between his nervous system and the physics of striking and defending. The brain was invited but not in charge.


This, he would later learn, was the entire point.

 

In the Isshin-Ryū tradition, Shimabuku said: 'One must train every day.' Not for strength, not for pride — but because the body forgets, and violence does not give you time to remember.

 

Part Two: The Long Middle

 

Chapter 5 — What Training Is Actually For

 

He trained for a year before he began to understand what training was actually for.

He had assumed, when he started, that it was about technique — about learning a catalog of moves that he could deploy if needed. He had imagined it like learning to use a fire extinguisher: you study the instructions, you practice the motion a few times, and when the moment comes, you remember what to do.

He was entirely wrong.


What Sensei Ruiz was building in him was not a catalog. It was a nervous system.


She explained this to the class one evening in terms he found unexpectedly scientific. Under acute stress — real threat, not sparring — the brain's prefrontal cortex, the seat of deliberate planning and complex cognition, goes partially offline. The amygdala takes over. Heart rate spikes. Vision narrows. Sound may seem to disappear. Time distorts — either stretching out in eerie slow motion or collapsing so fast that the encounter is over before it seems to have begun.


'In that state,' she said, 'you will not remember a technique you learned last month. You will barely remember your own name. What you will have is whatever has been trained past the point of conscious recall — whatever has gone deep enough to be automatic. That's what we're building. Not information. Not skill. Reflex with wisdom attached to it.'


He thought about the saying he'd heard in a documentary about special operations soldiers: you don't rise to the occasion — you fall to your training. At the time he'd found it grim. Now it seemed simply accurate.

 

Chapter 6 — The Ethics of It

 

Six months in, Sensei Ruiz spent an entire Tuesday class on something that had nothing to do with movement. She taught them the ethics of self-defense.


Not Nevada law — though she covered that too. NRS 200.120 defined justifiable homicide; NRS 200.130 set out the conditions under which deadly force was permissible in self-defense: a reasonable belief that deadly force was immediately necessary to prevent death or serious bodily injury. She was precise and careful about it. The law mattered, she said. It mattered practically, and it mattered morally.


But the deeper question, she said, was philosophical. And it was one that every serious practitioner of martial arts had to answer for themselves, clearly and honestly, before they needed it.


She laid it out in three principles.

 

The first was proportionality. The force you use in self-defense must be proportional to the threat you face. Using lethal force — or force capable of causing serious injury — in response to a threat that does not rise to that level is not self-defense. It is assault. The moral weight of causing harm to another person does not disappear because you were frightened. Proportionality is what distinguishes a defender from a predator.


The second was necessity. Self-defense is justified only when there is no reasonable alternative. If you can walk away, you walk away. Martial arts training does not license aggression — it licenses capability. The capable person can afford patience and de-escalation that the frightened and unskilled person cannot. Training, paradoxically, should make you slower to fight, not faster, because it removes the urgency of the untrained person's fear.


The third was imminence. The threat must be happening now, or be immediately about to happen. A threat that occurred last week, however genuine, does not justify force today. This is not only a legal standard — it is a moral one. The right to use defensive force is time-bound. It expires when the threat ends.


'You are training,' she said, 'to be the safest possible person in the room. Not the most dangerous. The safest — because a person who can protect themselves and others, and who understands the gravity of that capability, is a far less dangerous presence than someone operating out of fear.'

 

He wrote those three words in his notebook that night: proportionality, necessity, imminence. He would think about them for years.

 

Chapter 7 — What Stress Does to You

 

About eight months in, Sensei Ruiz began incorporating stress drills. Multiple simultaneous attackers — using protective gear and controlled strikes — circling, shouting, coming from angles he didn't expect. His first time through one of these drills, he froze for nearly two full seconds, which in a real encounter might have been the whole game.


She wasn't surprised. She had seen it a hundred times.


She explained the freeze response — the third branch of the stress trifecta, less discussed than fight or flight, but arguably the most common in genuinely ambiguous threat situations. The nervous system, confronted with incomplete information, defaults to immobility while it processes. This is an ancient anti-predator response. It can save your life if the predator is a tiger responding to movement. It is considerably less useful if the predator is human.


Training against the freeze, she told them, was the specific and irreplaceable value of scenario-based practice. You couldn't train it out in kata. You had to encounter the stress, repeatedly, in conditions approximating real threat, until your nervous system learned to route around the freeze and continue moving. There was no shortcut.


She also told them what else to expect in a real encounter. Tunnel vision — the perceptual narrowing that fixates on the immediate threat and drops peripheral awareness to near zero. Auditory exclusion — sounds becoming muffled or disappearing entirely. Tachypsychia — the bizarre distortion of time, so that a three-second encounter might be remembered as lasting thirty. And the memory fragmentationafterward: not lying, not confusion, just the simple biological fact that traumatic events are stored differently than ordinary ones, in pieces, out of order, with gaps.


'If this ever happens to you,' she said quietly, 'and afterward your memory of it seems strange and full of holes — that is normal. That is your nervous system doing exactly what it is designed to do. It does not mean you did anything wrong.'

 

Chapter 8 — OODA

 

She introduced the OODA Loop — Colonel John Boyd's model of decision-making in conflict — not as military doctrine but as a practical map of what happens in the human mind during a fast-moving dangerous situation. Observe, Orient, Decide, Act.


The key insight, she said, was the Orient step — the one most people overlooked. Orienting was not just interpreting what you saw. It was interpreting what you saw through everything you already were: your training, your experience, your expectations, your fears. Two people could observe the same event and orient on it in completely different ways, producing completely different decisions and actions.


The value of training was precisely that it loaded the Orient step with something useful — with pattern recognition, with pre-decided responses to common scenarios, with the compressed wisdom of thousands of repetitions. When you encountered a threat and your body already knew what to do, the loop compressed. 


Observation fed immediately into orientation fed immediately into action. The deliberate decision step — which stress cripples — was largely bypassed.


'You train,' she said, 'so that in the worst moment of your life, your body already knows the answer.'

 

Part Three: The Off-Chance Encounter

 

Chapter 9 — Two Years Later

 

Two years and four months after he walked into Elena Ruiz's dojo, Marcus was standing in the parking lot of a gas station on the south end of town at eleven o'clock on a November night, filling his truck's tank, when he heard a woman's voice rise sharply from the direction of the air/water station at the lot's edge.


He was in Condition Yellow. He had been for two years.


His eyes moved before his mind formed a thought. Two men and a woman. One man had her by the arm. The other was standing between her and the gas station entrance, and his posture — weight forward, head angled down — was the posture of someone performing dominance, not threatening to leave.


Marcus's heart rate jumped.


He capped his gas tank. He did not run toward them. He walked at a measured pace, and as he walked, he was already thinking the things she had taught him to think.


What am I seeing? What are my options? What is the minimum force this situation requires?

 

He stopped at a distance and spoke in a voice that was flat and clear and carried without shouting.


'Hey. You okay?'


The question was directed at the woman. This was deliberate. It forced the men to acknowledge a witness without giving them anything to escalate against.


The man holding her arm turned. He was bigger than Marcus, and younger, and the look he turned on Marcus was the calculation look — the one Sensei Ruiz had described as target assessment. 


Is this person worth dealing with?


Marcus held his ground. He let his hands drop to a relaxed, visible position at his sides — not raised, not aggressive, open and visible. He kept his eyes on the man's collarbone, not his eyes. He kept his weight balanced over both feet.


'None of your business,' the man said.

'I'm not looking for trouble,' Marcus said. 'I just want to know if she's all right.'

The woman said: 'I don't know these men.'

 

Chapter 10 — The Decision

 

What happened in the next four seconds was not a fight. It was a decision — made in the space between stimulus and response that Sensei Ruiz had spent two years helping him widen.


The larger man let go of the woman's arm. He took a step toward Marcus. His hands came up in the loose, half-raised posture of someone deciding whether to commit.


Marcus's nervous system was already elsewhere. His heart rate was elevated, but not catastrophically — months of stress inoculation had kept him, just barely, on the manageable side of full panic. His vision had narrowed, but he was aware of it narrowing, which meant he was compensating, which was something he'd practiced. He saw the man's weight shift to his front foot.


He had already decided.


Not to fight — not if he could avoid it. But to be ready. To be precisely as ready as the situation required and not one increment more.


He said, calmly: 'The station has cameras. And I've already called 911.'

He had not called 911. But his phone was in his hand.


The second man said something to the first in a low voice. The first man held Marcus's eyes for a moment — three seconds, maybe four, which felt like considerably longer — and then he turned. They walked to a car at the lot's far edge. The engine started. They drove away.

 

Marcus stood in the parking lot for a long moment. His hands were shaking. His mouth tasted like copper. He became aware that his breathing had gone shallow and corrected it — the open-glottis breath Sensei Ruiz had drilled into them for managing arousal: in through the nose, out through the mouth, unhurried.


The woman was still standing by the air station. She was shaking too.


He did call 911. He stayed with her until the officer arrived. He gave a statement that was calm and specific and accurate.


He drove home very carefully.

 

Chapter 11 — Afterward

 

He told Sensei Ruiz at the next class. She listened to the whole thing without interrupting. When he finished, she was quiet for a moment.


'What did you do wrong?' she asked.


He had expected something else — praise, maybe, or a nod of acknowledgment. He had to think.


'I got too close,' he said. 'I stopped at about fifteen feet. I should have stayed at twenty-five. Given myself more time.'


She nodded. 'What did you do right?'


'I didn't fight,' he said. 'There was no reason to fight. The goal was to make it not worth their while.'


'And?'


He thought. 'I stayed on my feet. I kept breathing. I gave them an exit.'


She nodded again, and this time she allowed something that was almost a smile.


'The best self-defense,' she said, 'is the one that never required striking anyone. That does not mean weakness. It means you understood your actual goal, which was not to demonstrate capability — it was to ensure that one person got home safely that night. Two, counting yourself.'

 

He trained for another three years after that. He tested for his shodan — his first-degree black belt — on a Saturday morning in April, in a small gym with six witnesses and a wooden floor that creaked underfoot. He performed Seisan, the kata that had started it all, and the movement that had once felt mechanical and foreign moved through him like something he had always known.


He was not a fighter. He had never wanted to be a fighter.


He was something more useful: a person who had paid serious, sustained attention to the fact that violence is real, that it does not announce itself in advance, and that the prepared civilian who understands both its physical mechanics and its ethical weight is — as Sensei Ruiz had told him on his first day — the safest possible person in the room.


Epilogue: What This Story Is About


This is not a story about a man who learned to fight. It is a story about a man who learned to see — to perceive his environment honestly, to read threat and intent, to understand the moral weight of capability, and to make wise decisions under pressure.


The research underneath this narrative is real. The Cooper Color Code, the OODA Loop, the physiology of stress — tunnel vision, auditory exclusion, tachypsychia, the freeze response — the ethics of proportionality, necessity, and imminence: these are not fictional devices. They are the foundations of serious self-defense education, drawn from psychology, neuroscience, legal philosophy, and decades of martial arts tradition.


Isshin-Ryū is a real art, with a real lineage, built by a real man who believed that the practical demands of self-protection and the cultivation of character were not in tension — that training the body with discipline and intention was one of the most honest ways to develop the whole person.


The lesson of Okinawan martial arts, echoed across traditions and centuries, is this: the person who has genuinely prepared for conflict is the person least likely to seek it, most likely to avoid it, and most capable of surviving it if it cannot be avoided. The reluctant warrior is not a contradiction. It is the goal.

 

'Train hard. Avoid conflict. Protect the innocent. Know when to walk away — and know what to do if you cannot.' — Traditional Dojo Precept

 

                                   — End —

                         The Reluctant Warrior  

No comments: