Please take a look at Articles on self-defense/conflict/violence for introductions to the references found in the bibliography page.

Please take a look at my bibliography if you do not see a proper reference to a post.

Please take a look at my Notable Quotes

Hey, Attention on Deck!

Hey, NOTHING here is PERSONAL, get over it - Teach Me and I will Learn!


When you begin to feel like you are a tough guy, a warrior, a master of the martial arts or that you have lived a tough life, just take a moment and get some perspective with the following:


I've stopped knives that were coming to disembowel me

I've clawed for my gun while bullets ripped past me

I've dodged as someone tried to put an ax in my skull

I've fought screaming steel and left rubber on the road to avoid death

I've clawed broken glass out of my body after their opening attack failed

I've spit blood and body parts and broke strangle holds before gouging eyes

I've charged into fires, fought through blizzards and run from tornados

I've survived being hunted by gangs, killers and contract killers

The streets were my home, I hunted in the night and was hunted in turn


Please don't brag to me that you're a survivor because someone hit you. And don't tell me how 'tough' you are because of your training. As much as I've been through I know people who have survived much, much worse. - Marc MacYoung

WARNING, CAVEAT AND NOTE

The postings on this blog are my interpretation of readings, studies and experiences therefore errors and omissions are mine and mine alone. The content surrounding the extracts of books, see bibliography on this blog site, are also mine and mine alone therefore errors and omissions are also mine and mine alone and therefore why I highly recommended one read, study, research and fact find the material for clarity. My effort here is self-clarity toward a fuller understanding of the subject matter. See the bibliography for information on the books. Please make note that this article/post is my personal analysis of the subject and the information used was chosen or picked by me. It is not an analysis piece because it lacks complete and comprehensive research, it was not adequately and completely investigated and it is not balanced, i.e., it is my personal view without the views of others including subject experts, etc. Look at this as “Infotainment rather then expert research.” This is an opinion/editorial article/post meant to persuade the reader to think, decide and accept or reject my premise. It is an attempt to cause change or reinforce attitudes, beliefs and values as they apply to martial arts and/or self-defense. It is merely a commentary on the subject in the particular article presented.


Note: I will endevor to provide a bibliography and italicize any direct quotes from the materials I use for this blog. If there are mistakes, errors, and/or omissions, I take full responsibility for them as they are mine and mine alone. If you find any mistakes, errors, and/or omissions please comment and let me know along with the correct information and/or sources.



“What you are reading right now is a blog. It’s written and posted by me, because I want to. I get no financial remuneration for writing it. I don’t have to meet anyone’s criteria in order to post it. Not only I don’t have an employer or publisher, but I’m not even constrained by having to please an audience. If people won’t like it, they won’t read it, but I won’t lose anything by it. Provided I don’t break any laws (libel, incitement to violence, etc.), I can post whatever I want. This means that I can write openly and honestly, however controversial my opinions may be. It also means that I could write total bullshit; there is no quality control. I could be biased. I could be insane. I could be trolling. … not all sources are equivalent, and all sources have their pros and cons. These needs to be taken into account when evaluating information, and all information should be evaluated. - God’s Bastard, Sourcing Sources (this applies to this and other blogs by me as well; if you follow the idea's, advice or information you are on your own, don't come crying to me, it is all on you do do the work to make sure it works for you!)



“You should prepare yourself to dedicate at least five or six years to your training and practice to understand the philosophy and physiokinetics of martial arts and karate so that you can understand the true spirit of everything and dedicate your mind, body and spirit to the discipline of the art.” - cejames (note: you are on your own, make sure you get expert hands-on guidance in all things martial and self-defense)



“All I say is by way of discourse, and nothing by way of advice. I should not speak so boldly if it were my due to be believed.” - Montaigne

Search This Blog

Coping Skills

Blog Article/Post Caveat (Read First Please: Click the Link)

Lets start out with what I believe coping skills are then we’ll work into how that applies to karate and martial arts for self-defense. Coping skills are those defense mechanisms we develop to avoid or lessen psychological pain and coping skills are those skills we learn to deal with various stressors. In a psychological perspective coping is the use of a conscious effort to solve personal and interpersonal problems in order to minimize or tolerate the stresses of conflicts often referred to as coping strategies and coping tactics. 

There are books and web pages and organizations that express definitions of coping skills or strategies/tactics that span volumes of data and information but the above is at least a fundamental explanation of coping skills. 

They go on to explain, basically, the types of coping skills, i.e., appraisal-focused where the individual challenges their own assumptions effecting their perceptions and those distinctions from their experiences, studies and overall understandings, adaptive cognitive. Then there is the problem-focused where the individual works to reduce or eliminate the stresses of live from conflicts, adaptive behavioral. The third one is emotion-focused where the individual works to change their own emotional reaction to those stressors of life with emphasis in the case of violence toward how we emotionally react to conflicts.

We therefore, overall, have to learn and then change the way we think and feel toward those stimuli that create such stressors that can lead to the types of conflicts and possible violence that is not productive or even an acceptable form of communications. We need to learn about our emotions and how to handle and release effects of the emotions, etc., that I tend to call reining in the monkey brain. In the second type of problem-focused adaptive behavior it is about first knowing and understanding those problems that effect our assumptions and how we emotionally react to those stimuli, i.e., if you don’t know about it and how it works, how can you find, learn, create and implement those coping skills that will allow you to handle conflict and violence in an appropriate way? 

Then I tend to ask myself, “If coping skills hold such importance then why is that not a subject of teaching?” Such coping skills are often assumed and addressed in the most effective way by families and societies yet those assumptions can and often are based on inaccurate and incorrect data and facts and knowledge of the subject where many make assumptions from emotions and feelings taught through media sources rather than a focus and conscious effort of the subject itself.  

In karate and martial arts for self-defense most of what we need to know, learn and understand about self-defense is also often left and assumed the individual either already has the appropriate coping skills or that they will find them instinctively. To leave that type of skill to such assumptions is incorrect and will leave each individual exposed to the dangers from conflict and violence because it comes down to what Mr. MacYoung often relates to us, we don’t know what we don’t know effects. If you don’t know of it, how it works and how it effects us both as a target and as an adversary then how can you evade it, escape it, avoid it or deescalate it in yourself and your adversary? 

Ask yourself when you are preparing the next self-defense session, does your training program involve a conscious subject of coping skills regarding conflict and violence along with appropriate actions to handle such situations? Taking an adversary down and choking them into submission may not be the most effective coping skill if that adversary confronts you, do you know that and do you know tactics and strategies that help you avoid that need? 

I can tell you that personally, my upbringing did not teach me the coping skills I needed for every day stressors and no where did they teach me how to cope skillfully with things I encountered as an adult. I can tell you that even today I am still learning about coping skills I felt should have come much earlier in life that are eye opening for me even at the age of sixty-two years (and that is with forty years of karate and martial arts training and practice too).

Bibliography (Click the link)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coping_(psychology)

No comments: