Tao [道] of Introversion

Tao [道] of [の] Naikō-sei [内向性] (内向性の道)

Over the last six decades I often wondered why I didn’t seem to fit in and in the last few years it came to me that I’m an introvert.

I’m not shy and as you will see in this posting, introverts are not necessarily shy even though others who encounter them tend to get a feeling of shyness.

I know I’m not shy because of my success as a U.S. Marine, I served ten years on active duty and earned the title of Staff Sergeant in just shy, no pun intended, of six years. I led and trained up to forty plus Leathernecks, ran a dojo, and was an instructor of Marines leading to qualification for their original MOS, military occupational specialty.

In short, I did well as an introvert in an extroverted world.

I have felt all the emotional traits explained below while not being able to understand “why” things affected me the way they did, but the last few years have opened my mind and heart to my true self.

I feel that in the spectrum of extremes I call yin/yang, that my true nature lies to the far end on introversion and I am happy and content with that. Since so few understand this dynamic and since most believe wholeheartedly they are all extroverted and all introverts are just shy people with me saying, ain’t true folks!

So, read on brothers and sisters - AND BELIEVE!

My true self involves the character traits that follow:

• Introverts are often the middle Child and family.

• As an introvert, I will beg borrow and steal every possible moment of solitude.

• Solitude allows me to recuperate from being around others after social encounters.

• Social interactions drain my energy while solitude and silence invigorate and recharge me. 

• When fully invigorated and calm and content, I can enjoy interactions and I am aware of the drain and act accordingly when that energy is depleted; so understand this when I disappear to a corner of the environment to be alone.

I quote, “Being introverted has to do with how you gather energy. You might be introverted if you’re energized by solo time and feel drained after prolonged social interactions.” - https://tinyurl.com/2bt76rv8

• reserved and thoughtful 

• avoid special attention and social engagement's

• prefer to occupy a quiet corner with a book 

• prefer a quiet night at home

• feel exhausted and drained after interacting with anyone other than a close friend or two (after a time I need to get away from close friends too)

• prefer spending time in smaller groups of people or alone

• tendency to spend a lot of time absorbed in my imagination and the inner landscape of my thoughts

• likely to act with restraint than impulse

• keep my thoughts and feelings to myself

• generally won’t pursue thrills and new sensations until I’ve takin plenty of time to consider my choices

• periods of solitude are essential for optimal health and well-being

• time alone prompts feelings of peace and relied

• It’s not true that introverts hate social interaction and avoid it entirely. All the same, I might find myself needing more time to recharge between events than a more extroverted person

• Hanging out with friends on Friday might max out my energy, leaving me craving solitude on Saturday to rest and refuel.

• introverted people tend to have a greater sensitivity to negative evaluation and criticism

• find it tough to share my thoughts when I believe others might disagree with me or disapprove of my opinion

• find working in groups particularly bothersome 

• Working at my own pace gives me time to reflect and consider my approach before focusing my energy on the task, without having to navigate group dynamics or tune out the chatter

• find it easier to concentrate when working alone.  

• choose solitary pastimes, like reading, woodworking, etc.

• rather do the research and write up the report than present it

• hover on the fringes where I escape notice

• a small circle of friends, high-quality relationships play a major role in happiness for introverts

• need more time to myself than an extroverted person might, so I probably have less time to spend connecting and catching up with a crowd

• find myself daydreaming or running through scenarios in my mind before I settle on a plan of action

• need more time to process information

• weigh options carefully when making decision's

• have an active inner thought process

• catch myself “escaping” from unpleasant or stressful situations by letting my mind wander or drift to something more relaxing

• turning inward may offer introverts a way to leave situations that feel chaotic or uncomfortable. In short, it can serve as a survival mechanism, of sorts

• writing out my thoughts comes naturally

• have a hard time offering a quick opinion about anything

• introverted people might experience emotions more intensely and have trouble managing those emotions. This greater sensitivity could help explain why many introverts develop depression

• want to share my energy with people I can trust not to overwhelm me