Boundaries

Blog Article/Post Caveat (Read First Please: Click the Link)

Marc MacYoung has some good stuff in this concept and I would recommend highly you visit his site to catch up on "boundaries." This is my take on the subject of boundaries for self-protection. 

First and foremost, one must create, believe and set there own boundaries and do so in a way that it becomes as natural as breathing so as to NOT induce stressors above what would be normal for every day normal life and behaviors. Look at it as a layered concept that triggers the heightened awareness to warn you when the signs on the road indicate some sort of obstacle or obstruction or danger coming down the road you are traveling.

First, look out past your outer safety zone to see whether things are "comfortable" or "not comfortable." Let your natural feelings through your understanding of what is normal/comfortable and what is not normal/abnormal/uncomfortable. You already do that because we often travel around when some spidey sense tinkling makes us automatically more aware because it kind of trips the old freeze, flight or fight response. This will happen most times long before you enter a zone of danger with possible violence. 

Second, once you determine something out there is making you feel uncomfortable start your analysis, "What is it that makes this feeling rise up, what abnormality is triggering my spidey sense?" This is the time you assess what is going on that is out of synch with the environment you are in or are entering. This is the time for avoidance because if you cannot determine what is trigger the spidey sense, an abnormality that makes you feel the discomfort, you should be looking to exit, stage left or right or to the rear, and get "the flock out of there." 

Third, there is always the chance that something got past your outer perimeter of safety, the outer boundary you have set for initial detection and warning, and that is when you must know and believe of secondary boundaries that can be set when approached in the exclusion zone, the area immediate and in close proximity to you, by someone or something with potential to cause harm and even death. 

They have passed into your limited area or zone somehow and then entered your exclusion area/zone meaning they are in direct access to you, your body and your safety/security, i.e., close enough to smell their breath; close enough to reach out and touch you; close enough to reach you with a leg/foot; close enough that with one step they can now do you harm. 

If they enter your exclusion zone but have not yet reached that distance of one-step entry to your body then you can physically and verbally begin to set immediate security boundaries by "putting up the open hands facing toward the approaching person or thing, verbalize that they must stop and then demand they immediately stop or as a last resort if that fails begin the movement to keep distance of relative safety between you and them, or it or him/her while articulating that boundary you need for safety and security. 

While moving, keeping the hands and arms up in the defensive open-handed/palm out to them position and maneuvering to put a barrier/barricade between you and them/him and trying to find and escape to safety. 

Be prepared both physically and mentally to act, act as in to use self-protective methodologies with appropriate force necessary to stop the onslaught be in continued movement to your body or an actual physical violent attack. 

Remember, you may keep talking to explain to yourself, your mind, and to witnesses along with social media video recordings that what you are doing is within the boundaries of self-defense, the legal version or term. Two things happen, the internal verbalization along with vocalizing it tells your brain/mind what to do and keeps you on track when the adrenaline begins pumping. It also provides a distraction to the person on the attack as well as inform everyone and everything within hearing/recording that you are not the aggressor while implanting such thoughts into the witnesses head/mind so later, during questioning of first responders, you are setting the stage of legal and moral and socially acceptable self-protection for self-defense.

You see, setting boundaries in levels that allow you to think and act accordingly moves the adrenal stress-conditioned triggered emotionally involved responses to a lower lever so that your monkey mind does not take over the reins and drive your buggy over the edge of the cliff that is social and legal moral and acceptable actions can cause as much or more damage than the act of physically applied self-protection methods for self-defense. 

This is a lot like the boundaries of social interactions you use to keep others under control when in close proximity to you, i.e., distance from folks you don’t like and allowing closeness to those you do like, etc. When you have a meeting at work, when you are dealing with work associates for a mutial project and when you are at a function for social or work to socialize are all examples where you already create and maintain boundaries for social comfort, etc.

This is just the same process except that it involves your entire environment where more dangerous situations, events and people out of your control while traversing said environment to protect, defend and ensure security and safety. Doesn’t that sound beneficial? 

Note: if you are on facebook you can find Marc MacYoung’s page, as well as his FB No Nonsense Self-Defense page, to find his current sources of information, “boundaries,” as well as a lot of other great subjects of defense, etc. 

For reference and sources and professionals go here: Bibliography (Click the link)