Is Self-Fense Realistic?

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In a recent blog reading it came to me that due to the disparities between each human, be they male or female, that trying to teach or sell self-fense to those individuals is just not possible. We, each of us, are unique and have individual needs and wants and other such stuff that is, fundamentally, different from all other of our species.

Yes, we have like things that are somewhat able to match us up especially in the survival mode all humans have to deal with but when you start digging deeper beyond those facades you find, once again, differences. Differences that often require each of us to set aside when dealing with others so that we can - “Deal with Others.” This is true even in families, i.e., between spouses, between siblings and between parents and children. We all have to compromise and shift and change, at least when dealing with others, on a face level minimum. 

In the Self-Fense (most call it self-defense but since I have done a bit of study of MM’s work on violence, as with RM too, I like to use self-fense) model of most vendors they are only able to sell that product if they can create a model that would span a large audience of individuals, all with their own unique needs and wants and requirements, etc. This presents problems that result in self-fense being - NOT true and reality based but generic to the degree it is often useless in reality. 

I have to wonder then, is the self-fense industry any good or realistic or productive or efficient in reality? In general, I have come to conclude that toward most who seek out such vendor supplied products it is more a ego stroking feel good effort over a real reality-based need to protect ourselves. Those who actually need realistic reality-based methodologies are those who work and/or live in violence based environments or jobs that work in violence based environments. Like Police, Corrections Professionals, Body Guards, Military, Bouncers (some) and other professions that expose the members to violence or possible violence. 

This tells me that most, almost, all self-fense programs are simply tools to sell a product and that is why I often shout out when I read their testimonials and web sites and ads are written or presented in certain ways as if their program, for instance, is the ultimate warrior based military proven way to provide foolproof self-defense. Yes, there are programs out there that are realistic and run by experienced violence professionals while the others are sold by using “Compliance Principles (Influence principles)” that make folks feel good about themselves and instill a confidence that they are safe and secure. These folks, like most in our modern times, will never, ever, encounter the types of conflict and violence that truly require true relative realistic self-fense. 

When I view or review many of the karate and martial arts self-defense programs, by attending in the past and by academic reviews today, I feel like they are more what I feel is reality rather than what they think, feel and believe to be realistic. 

As instructors they are forced, in most cases I believe, to use compliance principles to sell the product and sell the individual into believing they are getting something unique and useful, the principles are use every day and in every moment of our public lives to get us to do things and buy things we might not truly want or might not truly realize is useless but it does hit on those human fundamentals so that we feel good and believe that we are safer and more secure. It works and most humans go through their lives completely without the realization of reality for we create our reality in our minds so we can survive. 

Humans tend to not think a lot about stuff for no other reason than if we thought logically about every single decision, etc., we would be stuck in limbo unable to move, to live and to … you get the picture. We look for shortcuts, it is all part of our survival needs and instincts and allows us to use that to survive. When it doesn’t then the self-fense you are sold may or may not work but it too has to be a knee-jerk reactive or proactive model as well so that a need to logically analyze and act is bypassed, think OODA here, and that is why the education, training and practice along with reality-based experiences is needed to program those tapes. 

Self-defense, mostly, is not realistic in my book. We can pay lip service all we want to self-sooth and stroke our ego’s into believing we are gaining and learning all those warrior combatives like technique based programs that are cookie cutter programs that fit everyone while failing to fit each individual but hey, we won’t ever have to prove either’s legitimacy.

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“In order for any life to matter, we all have to matter.” - Marcus Luttrell, Navy Seal (ret)