Theory vs. Reality

Remember that things you might read or see are simply theory until you are able to vet them out in reality, i.e. reality training or real life encounters. Until then it remains theory and academic. It might seem that simple yet, my theory to date, is nothing is that simple.

Things that seem simple are often very complex but our minds and our nature wants to put things in nice neat compact and simple packages. The first time I was to read about violence I tried to find simple steps to make it jell in my mind. I could not find any such simple formula to learn about it and that was an eye opener. Violence is very complex.

Even now I am reading Rory Miller's new book, "Force Decisions," only to discover yet once again that things are far more complex and convoluted than I imagined.

I was attacked as a teenager by a drug dealer who outweighed me by about one hundred pounds. I survived but felt I could have done something more. Today I reflect on such incidents and say to myself that for fifteen years of age I did pretty darn good. I lived and suffered only some bumps, bruises, cuts and abrasions - very lucky me.

As a Marine I encountered first an attempt to toss me out a second story building. It may not seem like much but you have to remember how much damage you get when gravity pulls you down a couple of feet to the cold hard ground. I managed to actually "act" and "end" the conflict. I survived that one as well. Later I was sleeping in my bunk, rack or bed and suddenly felt a huge pressure on my forehead. I instinctually woke and jumped down off the top rack and pursued my attacker. He was faster and got away but I survived the encounter and lived.

As a Marine, dangerous life you know and this was not even combat, I woke the next morning after a real bender to find my OD green issue blanket in ashes and a burn whole over my torso. This one was just lucky as LCpl Balthazar, never forget this guy, came by and said a couple of Marines kept setting my rack, bunk or bed on fire and he kept getting up and putting it out. I can only say in this event I survived through the will and effort of another Marine willing to set up to the plate.

My thoughts on these events as I consider those close encounters violent in nature but are not indicative of true violence and the kind of violence that one would live with in their jobs like Rory Miller and would live with in their lives like Marc MacYoung.

I was lucky and proud of it as other more minor incidents over the ten year tour as a Marine taught me that at least on those occasions I was lucky to have acted. I came to realize that often how I acted didn't sit well with me but now that I have at least been academically introduced to what violence and what violent people are really like I thank my lucky stars that I have "avoided" it and live a peaceful life.

Some of what I have learned theoretically and academically I have managed to assimilate but many things will remain theory and academic because I chose to have it this way. After all, I am 58 years young and I do want to get to be an old Marine, an old guy and remain healthy but aware.

Don't mind me, just going over some things and trying to achieve some enlightenment. I want to remind everyone who has been so kind as to register that they read my crap and enjoy it but that often it is part theory, part academia and just a smidgeon of experience.

Thanks for listening, you get to think about crap as you gain in years of life experience. I chose my path and I feel I chose wisely, now for some more fun. If you can't tell I like to write and hope to get good at it some day :-)

Oh, then there was the freeze. As a Marine on twenty-four hour duty I took time to nap in the bunk room. I suddenly woke and looked with my eyes to see a Marine with a large metal student driver sign standing about five feet from me in a poised position to toss it at my head with the long sharper end, like a javalin. I froze solid, couldn't move but I guess when my eyes opened and I looked directly into his he thought better of it, dropped the sign and walked out of the bunk room.  Phew, dodged that bullet. I have a feeling my reputation as a Marine along with my total awareness, at least it appeared that way to him I think, he punked out, lucky me. Phew, dodged the bullet. Only because of Rory and others efforts in putting the information out there did I finally realize that I did something normal but then I thought ......